Yes. I am happy.
But here's the thing. It's all relative.
You can choose to be happy or freaking miserable. I am now choosing to be happy.
Well, sort of. That makes is sound like it's the easiest thing in the world. It's soooo not.
See, my happiness is not necessarily only contingent upon me. There's another player in the mix....the hubby.
We both had resentment and anger built up for roughly the last 5 years. If you dig in the archives you will see the marriage class articles and some more of our trials and tribulations. I suppose even though we were working on things at that point, it didn't really work AND there were other contributing factors.
Don't you hate it when you realize hindsight is 20/20? I mean it's always that way...sometimes it's even more clear than 20/20....sometimes 20/10 even.
Honestly, I am so sick of counseling. Don't get me wrong. I am all for it. Totally, I'm a big fan, but I'm over it. Maybe we needed it, but maybe not. The thing that actually worked was removing some elements from our life. You know...the meddlers.
Plus I started reading the Fifty Shades series.
Seriously. That's all you need. People that can stay out of your marriage, and sexy books.
It IS a love story you know.
So with reading that series, we have seemed to find our passion again. Which is AWESOME! I mean there is something to be said for comfortable love. Let's face it though, there doesn't seem to be anything more exciting than being in love and in passion with your husband (wife, partner, whatever).
When you are in love like that, everything seems to fall into place. And it has, mostly.
We are still trying to figure out how to be parents. I mean good parents. It's not just about cuddles and feeding and playing at this point. It's messy now. Discipline and school (theirs, not mine) and friends and attitudes. That's the hard stuff. We have two laid back kids that generally listen pretty well. Then there's JJ. He's the unknown in the equation. He can be sweet and kind OR he can be a nutball and not listen and be destructive. We are still learning how to deal with that personality.
Work in progress. Forever I think. As long as we are doing the best we can and fix our mistakes as we go along, we'll be good.....if we don't end up in the funny farm.
So is this the key? I don't know. It seems like it's our key. Yours might be different. I will share our journey. Some of it, not all of it. I mean I'm sure you don't want EVERY detail, right?